Friday, February 17, 2006

The Coffee at Work...

There is really only one word I can think of to describe the coffee at work...and that would be "SLUDGE". It is bad...I mean this is the worst coffee I have ever had. But it is hot and full of caffinee, so I drink it anyway.
I used to drink coffee so full of sugar and cream that there was a weird syrupee concoction of sugar and cream. Gross. I evolved to drinking it with just flavoured creamer, Hazelnut being my favorite. Now When I do drink coffee it is usually balck. But the stuff that they pass off as coffee here at work is soooo bad, I cannot drink it with out 3 sugars and alot of that fake creamer powder shit...which only hides the coffee flavour, and all I am tasting is hot sugary creamer...yummy! *Note the sarcasm dripping of of my every word?*
When I am at home I usually drink tea, because, thanks to my dear mother, I get hartburn from coffee. But the coffee at work does not affect me that way...so it obviously cannot be real coffee...Plus black tea, aka orange pekoke, has three times the caffinee of coffee. I like caffinee! It keeps me happy and buzzing and strange enough to freak out all my co-workers!
I just realized that I talk about work alot...man I must have even less of a life than I thought! Sad...

Here are some things to do to keep a healthy level of insanity in your life!

19 Ways to Maintain a Healthy Level of Insanity

1. At Lunch Time, Sit in Your Parked Car with Sunglasses on and
point a Hair Dryer at Passing Cars. See If They Slow Down.

2. Page Yourself Over The Intercom. Don't Disguise Your Voice.

3. Every Time Someone Asks You To Do Something, Ask If They Want
Fries with that.

4. Put Your Garbage Can On Your Desk And Label It "In".

5. Put Decaf In The Coffee Maker For 3 Weeks. Once everyone hasGotten over Their
Caffeine Addictions, Switch to Espresso.

6. In the Memo Field Of All Your Checks, Write "For Smuggling
Diamonds"

7. Finish All Your sentences with "In Accordance With the Prophecy."

8. dont use any punctuation

9. As Often As Possible, Skip Rather Than Walk.

10. Order diet water with a serious face whenever you go out to eat.

11. Specify That Your Drive-through Order Is "To Go."

12. Sing Along At The Opera.

13. Go To A Poetry Recital And Ask Why The Poems Don't Rhyme.

14. Put Mosquito Netting Around Your Work Area And Play Tropical Sounds All Day.

15. Five Days In Advance, Tell Your Friends You Can't Attend Their Party Because You're not in the Mood.

16. Have Your Co-workers Address You by Your Wrestling Name, Rock Bottom.


17. When The Money Comes Out The ATM, Scream "I Won! I Won!"

18. When Leaving the Zoo, Start Running towards the Parking lot, yelling "Run for Your Lives, They're Loose!!"

19. Tell Your Children Over Dinner, "Due To the Economy, We Are Going To Have To Let One Of You Go."

Here are some of the sites that I visit to get myself through a full day of work! Check them out...they are awsome!





By the way...these sites may offen some...they arre not for the light of heart! LOL

5 comments:

Carol said...

Mel,

I am fine. How r things over there in frigid AB? Not sure where you thought that Keegan was married, he sure isn't. He just turned 16. (Unless there's something he's not telling me!!)

Unknown said...

Mom, what are you talking about Keegan being married?? I think you're crazy... *shakes head*

*whispers to Melanie* I think my mom's gone insane, don't mind her... *shrug*

Yeah, I talk about work all the time, too... I remember how I used to drink coffee like that... narsty!! I still have cream and a little bit of sugar... but usually when I do drink coffee, it's a mocha, without the whipped cream crap...

Hey, remember our 87 things to do when you're bored thing?? Don't you still have that somewhere?? You should post it!!

Mel said...

I thought I read about Keegan in one of carries posts...but apparently I am blinder than my eye doctor thought...

Yes Carrie...I still have it...I will try and post it soon!

Carol...I am fine...thing here in AB are cold! And we are finally getting some snow! Wreaking havoc with the road and dumb city drivers though! lol!

Mel said...

Yeah...apparently I cannot read...it said Reagen...Oops...my bad!

Check this out!

http://kevan.org/johari?view=Madmel

Carol said...

Hah, see I am not as crazy as you think. I was going to say if Keegan got married, that would sure be news to me.

I guess nice to hear you got snow, althought we have not had any here this year, and that works for me.